The Sizzle

Issue 197 - Tuesday, 26th July 2016 - Copper Shades Of A Morning


ACCC wants ISPs to be more transparent about internet speeds
Our mates at the ACCC want to make finding out what the real speed of an internet connection is in Australia easier than it is today. They've announced a discussion paper, seeking input from the public on what sort of info we want to see and how to get ISPs to display it. There's a need for this because how many times have you seen an ad for an ISP that says you can pay $20/m extra for a "speedboost" but it doesn't actually say what sort of boost your speeds will get. I hope the ACCC takes the US FCC's approach and makes ISPs provide info like typical speeds, latency and packet loss.

Should broadband be part of the Universal Service Obligation?
Another important arm of the government, the Productivity Commission, is holding an inquiry into the Universal Service Obligation. This is the set of laws that made sure everyone in Australia had access to a telephone (amongst other telecommunications related things). No farm left behind, or something like that. In this digital age with broadbands and interwebs, the Productivity Commission is suggesting we add half decent internet access to the things the USO covers, alongside payphones and landline phones.

Bob Mansfield returns to Apple to work on the car project that isn't real
Big Bob Mansfield (no idea if that's what the folk at Apple call him, I hope they do), is back swinging his dick around at 1 Infinite Loop (I have no idea if he swings his dick around, I assume he does though). Bob has been coerced out of semi-retirement, with a giant bag of cash, to work on the Apple Car project, which isn't a thing, but it totallllyy a thing. He'll be giving the nerds a swift kick up the arse to show Tesla they're not chumps. Of course, Apple is refusing to confirm anything at all about Bob or the Apple Car.

People realise Nintendo doesn't own Pokemon, shares drop
Nintendo's stock fell about 17% overnight as someone told the suits that Nintendo doesn't actually own Pokemon outright, so all that sweet cash from Pokemon Go isn't going directly into Nintendo's pockets. Nintendo owns 32% of the Pokemon Company, with the rest owned by Game Freak and Creatures. How did the people stuffing their cash into Nintendo's stock not realise this? I found out in like, 15 second Google of "Pokemon" and reading the Wikipedia page. Nintendo's still gonna get paid big time, but not as big as some people thought.

Google Maps get a visual tweaking
Google Maps has received a make over, with the map we all know and love receiving some tweaks to make important info on the map easier to find and more visually appealing. It actually looks a lot more like Apple Maps, if I'm honest. Some of the work on the colour palette does make things easier to view at a glance. Really nice update to what I think is the best thing on the Internet. I fucken love Google Maps and can't imagine life without it (well, I can imagine it, and life would suck). The iOS version of Google Maps also finally received the ability to add multiple destinations along a route!


The ideal duckhead
A sideways duckhead that allows your Apple chargers to stick out less from the power outlet. Yes. Apple should buy this company and all its patents for whatever amount the inventors ask for.

Solid cryptolocker resource
Been fucked over by a cryptolocker? This site by Europol, the Dutch police, Intel and Kaspersky sheds some light on what to do if you're stung by these ingenious bastards asking for Bitcoin. For some cryptolocker variants, there's ways to decrypt the data without paying the ransom! There's also great info on how to avoid having this problem in the first, and an attempt to find all the different cryptolocker strains out there.

Kids growing up with the internet and social media are weird
Sizzle subscriber Hugh Stephens tweeted this link in the morning and I read it all there and then because goddamn kids these days are weird. I'm sure every generation said that about their kids, but this story about and lip syncing pretty boy tweens used as bait to sell underage girls garbage is an amazing insight into what kids are into. As well as highlighting the fickleness of the modern day teenager and how much of their life revolves around crushes facilitated by social media. Although I was a teenager like, 15 years ago, I really don't remember life being anything like this.

Here endeth the sizzle (until tomorrow!)

The Sizzle is curated by Anthony "@decryption" Agius and emailed every weekday afternoon. Today's subject line is from Another Morning Stoner, by And You Will Know Us By The Trail Of Dead. Like The Sizzle? Tell your friends!